Facebook Slave

Posts tagged friend

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The White Veil

I’ve expected that fulfillment of Facebook’s plan would require me to have many more friends than I currently do. Unfortunately I’m shy and find it difficult to approach people I don’t know. So Facebook has decided to help point me in the right direction by showing me the people I am destined to befriend who I do not yet know.

Tyler is an enigma. What is behind that white veil? He seems to be a private person, not exposing anything to those who are not yet in his inner circle.

…his very small inner circle. Fortunately, I am already friends with 75% of his privy council. So I gather up the courage to send a friend request.

Again, I am faced with the Select friends of yours who know Tyler dialog. I’m a little confused. Why should Facebook think I am prepared for this task? I was unaware of Tyler’s existence until a few moments ago.

But Facebook must have a reason, so I take the task of building out Tyler’s cabinet seriously. I pause for a moment to reflect on the things that are important to 75% of Tyler’s friends. I realize this is the most I’ve thought about our 3 mutual friends in the past 2 years. I feel closer to them all.

I decide to suggest my 2 friends who would best fit into Tyler’s circle. Off the suggestions go! Like dandelion seeds, drifting into the world of dreams, the world of facts.

Filed under friend tyler

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My first fwend request

A few weeks ago, I met a friend’s sister briefly at a show. The following day, she returned to her native Japan, and I assumed I would never see her again.

Facebook has another plan for our friendship, though, and insists that I befriend her. So I do.

Although I believe that there is a reason for all of Facebook’s suggestions, I cannot subscribe to Satomi’s posts via SMS, as I do not have an unlimited SMS plan u_u.  I can, however, add her to a list. Oh what a great idea!

I can keep track of all my new facebook-recommended friends in one place now by adding them to the “New Fwends” list. So chill! I include a polite “it was nice to meet you!” and submit my friend request. The ball is now in Satomi’s court to fully realize Facebook’s Plan.

Oh shit! Apparently just requesting Satomi’s friendship isn’t enough for Facebook. Apparently I need to suggest friends for her too! Not just any friends, but friends who know her. This is hard. Looking through my list of friends for those who might know her, I can’t find any who haven’t already befriended her. Perhaps this is why Facebook believes we should be friends? I decide to select the 5 people I know that have met her, despite that they are friends already, and send those suggestions.

Feeling good, guys! Can’t wait to see my “New Fwends” list grow.

Filed under friend satomi